Earlier today we reported the tragic death of 15-year-old Jamie Hubley, an Ottawa who committed suicide on Saturday, and who documented the final, painful months of his life on his Tumblr bog. In a statement released by his family on Monday, Jamie’s father Allan Hubley said “bullying was definitely a factor” in his son’s death.
Jamie Hubley
“Jamie asked a question no child should have to ask — why do people say mean things to me?” his father said.
Following is Allan Hubley’s full statement, via the Ottawa Citizen. (Our earlier coverage on Jamie’s death is here.)
This past Friday, our family suffered one of the worst experiences that can happen to a family when we lost our boy — Jamie. To make this even more difficult, his death was the result of suicide.
I would like to thank all the family and friends that have been helping us get through these very difficult days. Very special thanks to everyone that came out in the rain to walk every foot of our community to look for our boy. The outpouring of support has shown us that our angel was loved by many and we were not the only people to witness his beautiful spirit.
Jamie was for most of his life a very happy and confident child. He was a compassionate person always looking to help others and didn’t have a mean bone in his body. Jamie often worked with me on community events and our many efforts to help others were made more effective with his ideas. From a very young age, he wanted to make a better community and a better world.
He was a championship figure skater for years and was just beginning to excel as a singer. He enjoyed acting as well and was involved in many different clubs and groups both in and outside of school. James’s family and friends unconditionally supported and accepted him for who he was and whatever direction he wanted to go in life.
James had been suffering with depression and was receiving care from doctors at CHEO and counsellors. These professionals, along with James’s family and friends, were trying to help him learn to cope with his depression and other issues, one of which was his struggles with his sexuality. He struggled with the idea that people can judge you harshly even when you are trying to help others. Jamie asked a question no child should have to ask — why do people say mean things to me?
Although James had a great many people who loved and supported him, something in his mind kept taking him to a dark place where he could not see the positive side of life, which led him to this drastic and tragic decision on Friday. Jamie is free of his pain now and there is a new angel, but we have paid too high a price.
There are some reports in the media and on social media that James was bullied. This is true. We were aware of several occasions when he felt he was being bullied. In Grade 7 he was treated very cruelly simply because he liked figure skating over hockey.
Recently, when Jamie tried to start a Rainbow Club at his high school to promote acceptance of others, the posters were torn down and he was called vicious names in the hallways and online. We had meetings with officials at the school and were working with them to bring an end to it but Jamie felt it would never stop.
We will not say that the bullying was the only reason for James’s decision to take his own life but it was definitely a factor. As his family and friends, or even if you never met him but want to help, we must do whatever we can to wipe out bullying for any reason in our society and especially in our schools. Young people are very vulnerable and have enough pressures in life to have to deal with aside from the stress of being bullied. My family’s wish is that no more families have to suffer the unbearable pain of losing a child. No child should have to deal with depression or feel hated because of their beliefs — that is not the Canadian way of treating others.
Bullying doesn’t always take the form of physical violence. Especially today with cyber-bullying on the Internet, children often feel there is no safe place to go; even when they are at home they can still be victims. Earlier I mentioned his posters being taken down. Many friends have offered to stand by the posters to ensure children that may want to meet and talk about issues that don’t harm others will be given the chance to do so. The school has made a promise to me that they will ensure the posters are protected. We hope from our tragedy others will become more active in stopping this cruelty towards children.
To this end, after my family and I have had some time to come to terms with the loss of our beautiful son James, I will be working hard to use my energy and public position to help bring awareness and resources to those groups working to stop the bullying and find a treatment for depression. Wendy and I have asked that all the people wishing to make a donation in Jamie’s memory can direct them to Youth Services Bureau’s Mental Health Walk in Clinic.
Over the years I have tried to help a lot of people and I was very proud that my beautiful boy was also learning the joy that comes from helping others. I need time to deal with the pain of not being able to save my precious boy and will speak more on his life and these issues later.
— Kanata South Councillor Allan Hubley
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No one should suffer at the hands of others just because you’re different! These bullies should pay for the pain, suffering, and the untimely death of Jamie! May Jamie rest in peace, and I hope these bullies get penalised for their actions!
I feel sorry for him :( We must stop this from happening!
:/ so sad..especially in 2011..
Very sad to hear R.I.P Jamie
Dam shame! I’m pissed
awww :(((
:(
each time there’s another report of this……these suicides have to stop. someone make it stop.
Wow, this one’s close to home! So tragic:(
Omg….Bullying will never stop and suicides will never stop I wish It would But It won’t that’s the truth Its sad But Its true We may not be able to save someone from committing suicide BUT we can speak up to Bully’s and not Be afraid But If someone wants to end there Life Let them Because If you don’t they will Be Miserable and Sad….
He was cute too! :’( I would go to his school, that way he didn’t have to be the only one! I think he’s adorable.. I have been trying to commit suicide for 2 month but failed… I feel the same way for him..
nothing in life is easy, but with age comes wisdom… hang in there, you never know what, or who tomorrow will bring. : ) love yourself, different is good.
I am saddened by this story…my heart hurts for all these young people who feel suicide is the ultimate solution…
I’m devastatd and made a video for him: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=98hMHcrK9kQ
Instead of a “like’ button we should have an “important” button.
http://vimeo.com/11321951
This hurts my soul. LGBT kids are the most wonderful, thoughtful, passionate, and loving human beings ever. I guess these qualities make them an easy target for bullying.
How awful! Another beautiful life wasted.
poor kid <3 r.i.p. lil boy
Facebook needs to get rid of the like button for bad events. Also, this boy looks like Rupert Grint, the actor who played Ron Weasley in the Harry Potter movies. Jamie could have done so much if he had lived.
so im starting a new website for people to go if they are being bullied, or just a place to go to share your story, feelings, or struggles. its brand new so its a bit bare but if youre interested in helping out, lending an ear, or supporting in anyway please friend request — http://facebook.com/SupportAgainstBullying
There are also hotlines available in the “about me”
ugh.. its breakin my heart! :’( rest in peace now jamie.
Hayden…promise me you will talk to someone!!!! Think of your family, who loves you!!!! Life is not always fair, but the tough times just make you stronger once you get through them. Can you imagine putting your family through what the Hubley family is going through. My family just went through a death…it hurts big time…and the pain doesn’t go away. Please talk to someone!!!!!!
If the “”bullies & tormentors”"….only knew …that the great creator of Life….LOVES US ALL…No IF , nor Buts…..He Created Each nd Every One Of Us…..its His Call To terminate Ones Life …..Not YOURS!!!……My Deepest Condelences To Jamies Dad , and his family….(L)
So disgusted at bullying…makes me sick to think of it. It happened to me many years ago…I really don’t’ know how I made it through those years…May God bring peace to Jamie’s family and may he sleep with the angels :(
It makes me sad to see all these gays getting bullied for being them, its heartbreaking to see this shit. why do bullies get joy out of seeing people, in pain, suffering, and on the virge of killing themselves? Wah. :c
So sorry for your loss-never met Jamie but wish I could have,if only to tell him it DOES get better.He sounds like an exceptional young man.God bless his family & friends. <3
Hayden Licht, please reach out to The Trevor Project at 1-866-488-7386
Rest in Peace Jamie <3 it’s so sad we lost another beautiful soul on this earth. My heart goes out to the family.
Poor baby. Are things ever going to get better?
Hayden, Please take something from this and do not try again. So many of us here in Ottawa who never even knew him are weeping for him and every one of those who feel the same way he did. I believe where he now is he can see how special he really was and what he could have been had he stayed. Hayden, please. Don’t.
Murder is a crime, if some one killed you they’d be tried for murder, it is a crime, this is the first point that must be made to kid’s. There was a time when people believed in a higher-power and suicide was the ultimate sin, but so many people don’t believe in anything anymore, so that fail-safe is gone.
I was bullied mercilessly as a kid, I had buck teeth, wore thick glasses, had ashy skin, was not very masculine, my dad was a preacher, you name it I had it in spades, I’m still here the thought of killing myself never occurred to me, and I am not a strong person.
I think that they teach you in school that survival is for the fittest, if my kid was gay, I’d teach him / her how to survive, to hell with making a stand, or forcing people to accept you, play by their rules until you don’t have to anymore. At 15 you shouldn’t even be concerned about who you’re gonna fuck, at they age everybody fucks everything anyway.
This killing yourself stuff has gotten out of hand period, they don’t report all the other teen suicides, but they’re off the charts, for all sorts of mundane stupid reason’s. Values have to be taught at home, killing is wrong yourself , others, animals and plants it’s wrong.
And there is this great out cry, people please, how many of you watch UFC, or the fights during hockey, our culture is built on strength, the weak are always the losers, you want to stop bullying you’d have to change everything about our culture. So feel sorry for this kid, I don’t he’s a murderer the only difference in him and any other killer is that we can’t prosecute him, he took the cowards way out to escape justice.
I’ve intiated a project much like, “Jesus”, (www.jesusfilm.org), with, “Prayers for Bobby”, (www.prayersforbobby.com). Let’s hope it gets traction!
Dammit, but there’s no more NEED for this s**t! There are organizations dedicated to prevention, if only we’d all get involved.
That’s my line, as well. I dearly wish Jamie,
Tyler & Eric had e-mailed or called me before doing anything rash and/or irreversible.