It’s been more than a week since Lizzo played that old crystal flute. But she stays living rent-free in the minds of haters.
People are mad that Lizzo played the crystal flute because they don’t like that a plus size black woman gets to be a positive part of history.
“It’s disrespectful to our nations history.”
Oh give me a break. You tried to overthrow the government and kill the Vice President
— Olivia Julianna 🗳 (@0liviajulianna) October 2, 2022
Based on people’s reactions, you’d think she did something really outrageous.
BREAKING: Lizzo has pulled Excalibur from its stone and laid claim to all of Britain.
— Andrew Coleman Francis (@AndrewCFrancis) October 1, 2022
Or raised the dead.
They're acting like Lizzo playing the flute will resurrect dead slaves for revenge
— Trey (@treydayway) October 1, 2022
Or some other mythical things we don’t really understand, but inherently support.
BREAKING: Lizzo has acquired the infinity gauntlet pic.twitter.com/wXDngQ7cJ1
— JRR is Jokien 🗡️🏹🪓 (@joshcarlosjosh) October 1, 2022
Or, maybe they’re just jealous.
A lot of people jealous that @lizzo can play the flute, when they can only dog whistle.
— Jennifer Wright (@JenAshleyWright) October 2, 2022
So, naturally, Lizzo is going to keep playing that flute.
Madison's estate is inviting Lizzo to not only perform there, but play the same flute again. https://t.co/NB75h5cpYz
— Juan Escalante (@JuanSaaa) October 6, 2022
Maybe she’ll take up other instruments, like David’s harp.
let lizzo play david’s harp. i bet she’ll play the secret chord that’ll please the lord.
— Piper Ramsey-Sumner (@cbfplr) October 2, 2022
Fortunately, reactionaries are always finding new things to react to. Next up: a lesbian Velma.
That clattering sound you hear in the distance is 100,000 screamingly fragile white dudes at keyboards retraining their performative ire from Lizzo to Velmahttps://t.co/4F3wdBLpwW
— John Scalzi (@scalzi) October 4, 2022
Meanwhile, old comments have surfaced from far-right anti-LGBTQ commentator Matt Walsh in which he railed against the idea of teenagers. Not the actual, real-life humans aged 13-19. Just the concept of teenagers. Why? Because it gets in the way of them being impregnated.
In the deleted blog post, Matt Walsh wrote that "Adolescence isn’t a product of brain chemistry — it’s a product of our expectations….For thousands of years, 13 year olds were expected to act like they’re 23, and those expectations were met." https://t.co/XOMVOeRjyF
— Ari Drennen (@AriDrennen) October 6, 2022
Gross. Need a palate cleanse? Here’s Lizzo loving the flute tweets. Keep ’em coming.
Some of these Lizzo flute tweets are gold 😩
— FOLLOW @YITTY (@lizzo) October 3, 2022