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Views & Voices

Kaitlyn Hunt’s Life – It Haunts Me

Sunday, May 26, 2013

The Kaitlyn Hunt story haunts me.

I can’t sleep restfully, my mind keeps wandering, and my heart is heavy. Kaitlyn Hunt’s story could be my story.

My first love was in high school – I was 15, she was 17. Then, I was 16 and she was 18. All of the kissing and touching and experimenting – it was consensual, it was emotional, it was… love.

Kaitlyn Hunt

And apparently, it was a felony.

I can’t imagine having my parents tear me away from her. Well, my mother did tell me to stay away from her after she found an “I Love You” note, but I chose not to listen.

I would lie to my parents just to be able to see her.

More to the point, I can’t imagine her going to jail simply because we were teenagers in love. I can’t imagine her entire life being ruined because of what we shared with one another in those years in the 1960’s.

As “lewd and lascivious” as it may seem to some people, and as wrong as the law may make it appear, it was the only thing in my 15/16 year old life that made any sense to me.

She was the first person who really got who I was; the first person with whom I didn’t have to pretend or change the way I acted. She certainly didn’t “make” me gay – she made me feel that it was perfectly normal for me to be who I was.

She made me feel worthy and loved not different and dirty. Perhaps this is what Kaitlyn and this young girl shared.

After 46 years, my time with her is still very much a part of who I am.

When she left for college our time together ended. My heart broke and I lost the one person who kept me grounded in who I was. She found her partner at college, and they are still together living a quiet life of happiness.

On the other hand, I lived a life of confusion and lies and denial for the next 20 something years… until Susan.

Life is hard enough as a teenager, gay or straight.

You’re trying to find your way, your hormones are raging, and if you’re questioning your gender – well that just adds to the confusion. You know you’re feelings are what they are, but if you’re parents were like mine, you were not allowed to have those feelings.

“Just date boys,” my mother would yell at me in desperation. And so the years of lying and denying began.

On Friday morning, Kaitlyn Hunt announced that she has chosen to fight the charges against her in the state of Florida. She will appear in court on June 20 and she could face up to 15 years in prison and she would be required to register as a sex offender if convicted.

My heart aches for her.

Yes, she broke the law — but is she really a rapist?

In the eyes of the law, yes, she is. In the case of this relationship, no she is not. It’s just all so sad and heartbreaking.

My heart also aches for the younger girl – the 15 year old me. What of her? Where does her life go from here? How does she cope in this world of right and wrong and love and hate and gay and straight?

Will she ever again trust her feelings or will her life be like mine – filled with confusion, lies, and denial? She’s lost her friend, and her life is definitely changed forever.

My daughter, the lawyer, reminds me all the time: “It’s a court of law, not a court of justice.”

Perhaps it’s finally time to change the law so there is some justice for all of the 18-year-old males and females who are no more a sexual predator than I was – or my first love was.

Kaitlyn’s lawyer said Friday: “Along with Kaitlyn and her family, we are going to fight to have the law changed so no other teenager finds themselves in this same position created by the State of Florida and prosecuted unfairly.”

I stand with Kaitlyn. I stand for change.

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35 more reader comments:

  1. 14 yrs old is too young…..the law applies to straight and gay people …I believe it is a just law.

    Posted on Sunday, May 26, 2013 at 11:37am
  2. you angst is misplaced this girl is horrid and needs to be prosecuted! you don’t harbor an underage runaway and MOLEST them!

    Posted on Sunday, May 26, 2013 at 11:38am
  3. I agree with you Sandy. The charges would have been the same, if not worse, if it had been an 18 year old male with a 14 year old girl.

    Posted on Sunday, May 26, 2013 at 11:44am
  4. As much as I feel sympathy, because I think the statutory rape laws need to be rewritten, I agree with Mandiee, the charges would have been the same or worse if it had been an 18 year old male with a 14 year old girl. And about this article, 15 and 17 is a two year difference and the girls in the Kaitlyn Hunt case were 14 and 18.

    Posted on Sunday, May 26, 2013 at 11:57am
  5. let’s change to law to make common sense….we should certainly be able to come up with something besides jail and registering as a sexual predator…that’s going way too far

    Posted on Sunday, May 26, 2013 at 12:00pm
  6. she was in a consentual relationship with the girl

    Posted on Sunday, May 26, 2013 at 12:06pm
  7. the girls parents waited until her gf turned 18 to prosecute her. thats a low blow

    Posted on Sunday, May 26, 2013 at 12:07pm
  8. when my parents found out about me being les, my dad threatened to call the police and arrest me when i tried to call a girl who was 15 when i was 17. she was in a foster home and her foster mom was treating her bad, i just wanted to make sure she was ok. so i never made the call and she was sent to a juvenile prison to wait until she could be moved to a new foster home. i feel this girls pain…

    Posted on Sunday, May 26, 2013 at 12:10pm
  9. So, Sandy and “Much Love”, this girl deserves to go to prison and forever be listed as a sexual predator? That’s screwed up and so are you two to think so. They are both kids.

    Posted on Sunday, May 26, 2013 at 12:19pm
  10. I support Kate!

    Posted on Sunday, May 26, 2013 at 12:29pm
  11. sad story

    Posted on Sunday, May 26, 2013 at 12:39pm
  12. Why does LGBT Nation keep posting this article? This isn’t an LGBT issue. These laws apply to everyone regardless of sexual orientation, and Kaitlyn Hunt is not being discriminated against.

    Posted on Sunday, May 26, 2013 at 12:48pm
  13. Why is young love illegal?

    Posted on Sunday, May 26, 2013 at 1:25pm
  14. As much as I really want to support this girl because I’m gay myself, I truly believe an 18 year old and a 14 year old is a bit of a gap in age for a teen relationship. Before I made my full opinion about this I made sure I did my research on this case. I was told that their relationship started before Kaitlyn turned 18 and she was 17 and that is not true. Kaitlyn was always 18 and the other girl was 14 and turned 15 later on after this got blown into what it is today. People before making a full honest opinion please look at all the details and not just what the media is saying. I believe a crime was commited here because the 14 year old did run away and was staying with Kaitlyn without the parents consent. Yes the other girl needed consent from her parents. She is still a minor by law and this also concerns sexual nature. I feel that the parents was in the right and was only looking out for their minor daughter. I don’t agree with the parents about not agreeing with homosexuality but that is their right and I can’t change that. This is my opinion about this.

    Posted on Sunday, May 26, 2013 at 2:07pm
  15. I also wouldn’t go to the extreme and give her the biggest punishment but it does need to be looked at as what it is. No sugar coating please! Thanks!

    Posted on Sunday, May 26, 2013 at 2:10pm
  16. Here is the affidavit – http://www.scribd.com/doc/142642135/Kaitlyn-Hunt-Redacted-Affidavit-Redacted

    http://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2013/05/21/us/hunt-arrest-affidavit.html?_r=0

    Now, this clearly states Hunt was 18 and the younger was a minor. It also shows Hunt knew what she was doing to a degree and the relationship began when Hunt was 18 and not beforehand. There is no LGBT issue here, just the law at work.

    Posted on Sunday, May 26, 2013 at 3:15pm
  17. The point people are glossing over is that they waited until Kaitlyn was 18 to file charges. If if was just about “sex”, they would have stopped/charged her immediately!!!!

    Posted on Sunday, May 26, 2013 at 3:41pm
  18. That isn’t what EVERY REPORT has said. They said the relationship started when Kaitlyn was 17. Send me the link to the report.

    Posted on Sunday, May 26, 2013 at 4:05pm
  19. Kaitlyns birthday is listed as 8/14/94 and the report says that both girls started dating in November and it became sexual by December. She was already 18 before their relationship took off. I so wanted to support her but these facts are very clear when this report became public. Here is the official affidavit that you can see for yourself: http://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2013/05/21/us/hunt-arrest-affidavit.html?_r=1&

    Posted on Sunday, May 26, 2013 at 4:17pm
  20. Posted on Sunday, May 26, 2013 at 4:26pm
  21. Do we, as adults, countenance the obvious molestation of an child by an adult? NO! We don’t approve of it for NAMBLA, nor should we approve of it because she is a woman. The laws apply to all, man on boy, man on girl, woman on boy and woman on girl.

    If we expect to be treated as equals we must also accept the consequences when ‘one of us’ breaks the law and uses us to defend her abhorrent behavior. I would expect an 18 year old man to go to prison for fingering a 14 or 15 year old girl. I expect the same if a woman does it.

    Posted on Sunday, May 26, 2013 at 5:10pm
  22. I also resent that we were lied to by Hunt and her allies about her age when the ‘relationship’ started. But then when do predators tell the truth anyway?

    Posted on Sunday, May 26, 2013 at 5:11pm
  23. This isn’t about young love, this is about predatory sex.

    Posted on Sunday, May 26, 2013 at 5:13pm
  24. I’ll reply. Yes, she should go to prison. She is a predator and a child molester. 18 is no longer a child.

    Posted on Sunday, May 26, 2013 at 5:16pm
  25. You’re a retard Charles. I bet right when she turned 18 she magically transformed into an adult. One day a child, one day an adult! It’s magic! Oooooh!

    Posted on Sunday, May 26, 2013 at 5:43pm
  26. You are right! Lock her up!!! She is vile sexual predator! She is a dirty molester!!! It is just!

    Are you kidding me, Sandy? Snap out of it! You people irritate the crap out of me.

    Posted on Sunday, May 26, 2013 at 5:47pm
  27. The molestation of a child? They are both kids in the same school together. Peers. You annoy me Charles. Is it so easy for you to ruin this girls life and want to send her to prison. You are an awful person.

    Posted on Sunday, May 26, 2013 at 5:50pm
  28. It’s quite a stretch to compare this to NAMBLA and you know it.

    Posted on Sunday, May 26, 2013 at 5:53pm
  29. Neil I couldn’t care less if I annoy you. And the only person who ruined Hunt’s life is Hunt herself. I will not let a predator and child molester off the hook just because she’s a lesbian.

    And the awful person here is you Neil, willing to permit molestation for a cause. Shame on you. Hunt isn’t deserving of our support or our admiration. She deserve prison.

    I was willing to give her leeway when we were told she was 17 when the relationship started, but now that we know she and her supporters lied to us about that I can feel nothing but disgust for here.

    Question: what else is she lying about? Another: Do we even worry about laws anymore?

    Posted on Sunday, May 26, 2013 at 6:47pm
  30. No Neil, you are the fool allowing a predator free reign. Do you really think an 18 yo is equal to a 14 yo?

    And for the record you ditzy little queen retard is a derogatory word for the mentally disabled. You can call me other names all you want but using a word that denigrates a whole class of people is not only offensive but immature and ignorant.

    Posted on Sunday, May 26, 2013 at 6:51pm
  31. No, I really do believe you are mentally handicapped. Why else would you say such stupid things? I would never call someone with down syndrome a retard, besides they are much brighter than you. And just because you are a fat miserable slob, doesn’t mean you have to take it out on everyone else.

    Posted on Sunday, May 26, 2013 at 6:54pm
  32. Who anointed you supreme being and allowed you to determine a young girls fate just because people drew an imaginary line in the sand of what an adult is. Look at you, you are quite old and yet act like a drooling child.

    Posted on Sunday, May 26, 2013 at 6:59pm
  33. Hahahahaha! You are a vile creature.

    Posted on Sunday, May 26, 2013 at 7:17pm
  34. There is not enough love in the world. I wish, hope and pray that Kaitlyn finds justice in an unjust world. She loved, I hope she will stay brave enough to love again one day.

    Posted on Sunday, May 26, 2013 at 7:33pm
  35. I think, if I were in her shoes, I’d divorce my parents. Of course, that’s easy for me to say since I’m not in her shoes. I wonder what she’s making of all this.

    Posted on Monday, May 27, 2013 at 1:34am