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Bullied gay teen’s suicide note: Insight on EricJames Borges’ tragic death at age 19

By Melanie Nathan
Special to SDGLN.com
Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Editor’s note: Raised in an extremist Christian household, assaulted in classroom with a teacher present, Eric James Borges, 19, of Visalia, Calif., was repeatedly bullied, tormented and terrorized for the duration of his childhood and teen years.

© Kristina Lapinski, GAY USA the Movie

EricJames Borges

Exorcisms, beatings and extreme Christianity pervaded his young life and did not “cure” him. “Disgusting, perverted, unnatural and going to hell” is what his parents told him as he was kicked out of his home.

Just last month, EricJames made a video for the “It Gets Better” project, a campaign that features personal hope-filled videos to LGBT teens to get them through difficult times. Although he said “it gets better” and asked other teens to “ never give up,” he could not live through the extensive damage to his psyche and the pain that life had brought to him.

On Jan., 11, 2012, EricJames committed suicide, shocking his friends and his co-workers at The Trevor Project. SDGLN Contributor Melanie Nathan attended one of his funerals, and obtained a copy of one of his suicide notes that gives insight on what he was thinking. This is her exclusive story.

“To my friends you gave me life and love, never think this was your fault … To Lady Gaga, you have been a fearless relentless proud LGBT advocate …”

- Excerpt from a suicide note by Eric James Borges.

Never before had the sound of “Edge of Glory” been so inconceivable; EricJames Borges chose Lady Gaga, and not only for the echo that would pave his heavenly journey but as a benefactor, leaving the last of his life’s dealings to his icon:

Five hundred dollars would go to Lady Gaga’s Born This Way Foundation, $500 to the Trevor Project, $521.56 to the Human Rights Campaign and almost $2,500 to his rescuer, Jennifer McGuire, for her upcoming same-sex wedding. “I want it to go where it deserves; to life, love and equality.”

Unlike during his life, 19-year-old EricJames Borges was in control at the end; he uploaded the music and chose the people; he designed his own funeral service and it was poignant. This past Saturday, Borges was celebrated at one of three memorials held in Visalia, and the one I attended was held by the small California Central Valley town’s grieving LGBT community, those describing themselves as his new family.

His religious-extremist parents had been invited but did not attend.

Mere months before, EricJames came out, recorded an “It Gets Better” video, made a short film and gave anti-bullying suicide prevention workshops to other teens; yet he could not sustain his own pain and committed suicide just two weeks ago.

I obtained an exclusive and copyrighted copy of one of his suicide notes addressed to Jennifer McGuire (page three is found to the right), and EricJames wanted all to know that he was grateful to the Trevor Project: “I do not want my passing to reflect poorly on the Trevor Project,” he clarified. “That organization was the best decision I ever made in my life.”

A confused community packed the convention hall, trying to grasp the pain that could have caused this young suicide, further perplexed that even after the rescue which took him from a world of shame and torture to one of acknowledgment and safety, he would still want to die.

And so he did, in the home of a tender stranger, who took him in like her own, and whom he described in his last note as “mother-like” to him. She gave him love, safety, comfort and a Christmas like none other he had experienced in his life.

While officiate and friend, William Van VanLandingham, the director of the local chapter of Trevor Project, noted that “we are not here to point fingers,” Jennifer McGuire, the kind stranger who had opened her home to EricJames and grown to love him, spoke to the mourners candidly:

“I am not going to avoid the elephant in the room. He tells his story better than any of us could in his short film and ‘It Gets Better’ video, but I need it to be spoken out loud – and said for him … his parents tortured him – there is no other word to describe it. What he shared in his video was the tip of the iceberg, and that’s only compared with what he shared with me, and I am sure there was more.

“His parents tortured him by not protecting him from the extensive bullying. His parents tortured him through their relentless, extremist religious teachings. His parents tortured him with shame and intolerance and emotional and physical abuse that most of us can’t even begin to imagine. And yes, I blame them, and not just a little, but for a majority percentage … His parents killed him.”

Continue reading at the San Diego Gay & Lesbian News

Editor’s Note: If you or someone you know needs support, please don’t hesitate to call the Trevor Project‘s Lifeline at 866-488-7386.

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Filed under: California

82 more reader comments:

  1. Bring attention to this now!!! Fucking disgusting to treat another human-being like this!

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 9:55am
  2. I’m soooooooooo mad!

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 9:56am
  3. So sad :-(

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 9:56am
  4. So sad we can not let this keeP happening to our future young people and we need to stand up and AMERICA WAKE UP I’m so upset what a messed up system we have with no tolerance

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 9:57am
  5. I’m still devastated that we lost this phenomenal person. I wish I could have known him. <3

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 10:03am
  6. Very sad… :(

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 10:05am
  7. heartbreaking

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 10:07am
  8. “How does he get a pass for his weakness when his weakness is something that could make life worse for thousands of LGBT and other bullied teens? How is it okay that he did something which discredits the entire movement he was a part of? How is that the least bit permissible. I don’t care if the whole world turns on me for this, but what that asshole did was wrong. If you put yourself in the position of being a role-model, then you’d better conduct yourself like one, or your actions are going to come under scrutiny. Well, apparent, in this weak-willed culture, they won’t. But they should. And as long as I am around, they will. Even if I’m the only voice not being completely drowned out by the collective moaning of your piss-and-moaning ilk.” -TJ

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 10:08am
  9. Why are these parents not in jail? :(

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 10:14am
  10. Ugh, i really dread hearing about another suicide due to bullying, something seriously needs to be done about bullying!

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 10:15am
  11. Omg! not again this has got to stop w/ EVERYONE!!! whether u play on my team (lgbtq) or not this is heartbreaking and needs to be STOPPED! being a victim of self destruct and suicide related issues i know where they are coming from…bc i have been bullied also but #ITDOESGETBETTER!!!!!!!!! you just have 2 get to the other side of the rainbow……. #WECANMAKEITOUT!!

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 10:20am
  12. ugh not again RIP wake up people how many more people do we have to lose before we do something!

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 10:25am
  13. This is so friggin’ ridiculous! Christians do not act the way his parents do. Christian means “Christ like” who did Christ do these kinds of things to. The extremist Christians need to stop fooling themselves, they are not Christ like there for not Christians… they are extremists, which I believe is a form of Greed. One of the seven sins.

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 10:28am
  14. His parents should be charge with assisted suicide…for there role in his torment.

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 10:32am
  15. This hurts because I have a lot of empathy with this situation. It hurts when the people you thought would love you no matter what treat you like that. Screw them. Doesn’t matter who it is. If love is not unconditional, its not real. I am so sorry for the woman that took her in. May god be with her and I hope the parents realize what they did.

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 10:37am
  16. Very, very sad. His parents should go to jail.

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 10:37am
  17. I’m a straight woman and proud mother of a wonderful gay son. I cried, I’m angry and ask “Why such cruelty and hate? How can parents be so cruel? How can a religion that supposedly touts love be so evil?” He was a fighter who tried to survive his severe deep wounds by keeping a positive face but his soul was dying and in the end his soul succumbed to the wounds of inhumane, evil cruelty. Right now I just want to hug my son.

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 10:38am
  18. I am saddened by this, but it did happen. Maybe he did this to change the world. Look how many people have been affected by this so far. Come on people lets not let his death go in vain! I don’t want to see anymore of this. His parents should be charged with something…

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 10:41am
  19. Susan, If only the world had more parents like you… When I told my mom that I was bisexual, she kept me away from my friends, boy or girl and told me that I was going through a phase that I would soon get over… Every girl I ever dated she kept me away from and told me not to embarrass the family… Now I am getting a domestic partnership with my transgendered boyfriend, and she said “Oh, im going to throw up…”
    I am in love with the man of my dreams and my own mother can’t even be happy for me… The years I lived at home were in hiding from my own family. Why can’t people see that what they say effects other people tremendously?

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 10:53am
  20. it starting to seem like a pattern of murders & suicide because of BULLY’S..isn’t it about time some politicians should discuss putting these fuc’n creeps.. in jail thier some of the worst criminals out there..!!

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 10:54am
  21. Poor thing :(

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 11:12am
  22. R.I.P. :(

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 11:26am
  23. I was bullied really b ad too, so i know what he was going through and I almost did kill myself. How sad. :(

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 11:28am
  24. It didn’t need to be like this, what a loss

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 11:28am
  25. I think it’s terrible that his parents did not attend his memorial service and celebrate his life. So sad. RIP Eric James, rest now in the arms of the Angels.

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 11:30am
  26. HOW tragic is this WOW..

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 11:36am
  27. This is a very sad moment. I know how many of you who knew EricJames Borges feel. My other half did the same thing. It is okay to be mad, hurt, angered, ect. Just do something about it. My pain and hurt almost Killed me! Talk to a friend, seek help if you or someone you know is thinking about doing this. It may be more than one life you save.

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 11:51am
  28. @Lynn Houck, in regards to your profound question, I ask that myself and ask others too, especially those who are the ones being cruel. I don’t get answers from those being cruel because they are so blinded and so caught up in their indoctrinated beliefs and defending those beliefs that they can’t even “hear” my words and questions.

    Science has shown the brain doesn’t function as well with clarity and reason when clouded with negative emotions of fear, anger and hate; all of which is the result of ignorance, misinformation, and lies that one succumbs to, whether through a life of indoctrinations through the church and/or family and community or sheer ignorant stupidity. This doesn’t justify their horrible behaviors but only shows the realities of human behavior that can arise with such narrow-minded ideologies that create opens doors and slippery slopes for cruelty.

    There is no greater wound of the heart when the perpetrator of the cruelty is from a loved one as a parent. From my own life experiences, although very different, I empathize with you and so many of the LGBT community who have suffered at the hands of people who they loved, who were considered important in their lives and even respected at one time, whether it is a parent, teacher, spouse, boss or friend. I carry that pain as a mother always. You are in my heart and soul. Namaste.

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 12:14pm
  29. Ahhh!! This needs to stop happening…..I wish I could reach out to everyone in pain and Give Love.

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 12:27pm
  30. This excerpt says it all……

    “His parents tortured him by not protecting him from the extensive bullying. His parents tortured him through their relentless, extremist religious teachings. His parents tortured him with shame and intolerance and emotional and physical abuse that most of us can’t even begin to imagine. And yes, I blame them, and not just a little, but for a majority percentage … His parents killed him.”

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 12:28pm
  31. Brother Borges stepped into the role of leadership willingly which opened up trauma that consumed him, obviously, his death is not hypocrisy nor is it a waste, he is a tribute to the violence that discrimination brings and its especially hard to handle violence from those who “love” us, post his parents picture on the front page of the local newspaper with a banner of God did this! God made these two parents and told them to discriminate against their son…give it right back to these so called christians

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 1:39pm
  32. Fascistic Christians – hateful and intolerant-you are a disgrace to mankind !

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 2:22pm
  33. So sad. Another statistic, a very human one.

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 2:59pm
  34. “Eric: May the Wings of Your Spirit Soar, with Freedom to Reach the Pinnacle of Love, Happiness, Acceptance & Peace…Needed So Desperately in Life”!
    ******************************

    Reading this description of the miserable existence Eric endured, just makes Me Weep in Sympathy…yet…Need to Explode with Anger!
    How Eric managed to survive, with the dignity he showed, is a complete mystery to me! Especially with {heavy sarcasm & disgust intended} parents, who should’ve shown Eric: Acceptance, Love, Support, Protection & Comfort…made where he lived a Safe Haven! Instead they made Eric’s life a living hell, constantly filled with Unimaginable Horrors!
    With both ‘parental/church’ Disgust & Hatred, in addition to all the outside Physical & Mental Abuse…
    Eric Never, Ever had the Chance to Grow & Thrive into the Beautiful Person he was Created to Be!
    Tho recently rescued, unfortunately & sadly for all, Eric finally succumbed to the Poison of all the Deeply Inhumane & Deadly Treatment, from others!
    It seems as tho, since he hadn’t any thru out his entire life… Sadly, the one thing Eric felt he could have control over, was his own death! Eric exercised it & planned all in great detail! My Heart Breaks & Bleeds Sympathy!
    Only Hope:Reading details of Eric’s Heartbreaking Story, will help cause enough people to realize, that this Fetid Atmosphere-encouraging Hatred, Bigotry & Ignorance-also directly contributes to Death! The only way to prevent it, is CHANGE!

    *NO H8* NO Bullying, NO Bigotry, NO Apathy, NO Hypocrisy, NO Ignorance, NO Prevarication, NO Prejudice-etc…
    *ONLY LUV* Acceptance, Support, Protection, Caring, Comfort, Safety, Tolerance-etc…
    *********************************
    *”Will the insanity of physical & mental bullying, intolerance, ignorant prejudice & bigotry ever end?”

    *”Apathy & Inactivity:Causes Why Our World Is So F*cked Up!”*

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 4:10pm
  35. Put his parents on trial for murder.

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 6:36pm
  36. Sharing this. Thank you.

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 7:42pm
  37. I didn’t “come out” until I was 30… though everyone knew!!! These kids add stress to their own lives by “coming out” at 10 y/o. If they took the time to mature…. and realize that they truly are gay…. not just curious…. this bulls*it might stop!!!!

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 7:43pm
  38. thats sad :(

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 7:44pm
  39. So terrible :/

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 7:44pm
  40. the world is so cruel, this is the reality and it hurts. be strong everyone. this is our fight,!!!

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 7:44pm
  41. GOD BLESS HIS SOLE

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 7:46pm
  42. it amazes me that parents would choose religion over there children….UGH….It makes me sick……….RIP…EricJames.

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 7:46pm
  43. I feel like a part of me just died and I didn’t even know him. But Please, don’t place all the blame of the parents. I believe when people get this far or decide to end it all it’s like they have horse blinders on. (In the movies with horse drawn carriages there those small squares of metal next to the horses eyes. They are there to restrict the horse’s vision can they only look forward.) These people are the same. There are thousands of ways out without taking their life but they can’t see them! We always say “If I could have talked to him/her” but sometimes we are fooling ourselves. I think the WORLD let them down. WE must take the blame also. No scapegoating. But this MUST stop and WE are the answer. The next generation is our future. Do you want them to do it by themselves? HELP THEM! Anyway you can. Our/ their future is at stake!

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 7:52pm
  44. Every single time that I have to sit here and read about another suicide, I get so angry. As a teen I went through all of these thing’s. Not only from others but also from my family. Yet I was brave enough to stand up to all of them. This poor man was tortured by his parents and many more and as much as I would like to say that I am sorry for their loss, I can’t. Instead all I can say is I am sorry for the Trevor Project and the people that were involved in his later life until his death. I have always been taught to believe that suicide was a sin, Yet I don’t live by the almight Bible anymore or by my church. I live by the books of Nicholas Walsh’s Conversations With God book series and I believe that everything he wrote is truth. Truth by God and God is a loving and forgiving God and he knows of Eric James’ pain and now EricJames is wrapped in Gods arms and love never to feel pain again. For that I am grateful. To EricJames and all the others we lost, I am so sorry. For all of those thinking that suicide is the way out, think again. I tried in 86 to take my life. I lived through it. I am blessed many times over even though one week later I was diagnosed with having HIV and given 6 to 12 months to live and now I am going on 26 yr’s. So hold your heads high. How did I live through all of that. I did it by living my life and telling myself that I am only going to live one life and one life only and I am going to live it by my own rules and not by societies rules. And thats what I did. You can do the same. Its not easy, you have to shut off all negativity and remember that everything you were ever told is a lie. You are all wonderful people.

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 7:54pm
  45. This NEVER gets easy to read. RIP EricJames!

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 7:56pm
  46. I am DEEPLY saddened by this! I too was cast out by my adoptive parents under those same words! Where is unconditional love? Where is the “true” love of God? People who call themselves “christians” and cast out their own flesh and blood and judge others to the point of causing them to take their own life…disgusts me! Christian means “Christ like”! My heart aches for this young man! May he truly be at peace from this world of hate and cruelty! R.I.P! I really hope his family can live with his blood on their hands!

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 8:00pm
  47. So sad :( May he RIP.

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 8:00pm
  48. hope your at peace now as most of us wish peace as well

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 8:07pm
  49. breaks my heart… fucked up people in this world…

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 8:08pm
  50. This young man’s story breaks my heart. As a mother, I cannot fathom treating my own flesh and blood, a child that I carried and gave birth to and nurtured, in this way. Nor can I imagine being able to pervert the teachings of Jesus so much that I could justify treating my child the way EricJames was treated. The only light I find in this story is that at the end he was surrounded by people who treasured him.

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 8:09pm
  51. Sending thoughts and prayers.

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 8:10pm
  52. What about some type of money from the US goverment to help teens who have no where to go when their families dis-own them for being the way God made them. We need to help people not tell them they are freaks and are going to burn in hell. We need to give them structure and allow them to see that people out there do accept them for who they are. And until we do this we are going to have more LGBT youth take their lives. Come on everyone we need to do something now. Not wait another day and allow another person to say I can’t take it anymore. And think that suicide is the only way out.

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 8:11pm
  53. One more thing I would like to ask of everyone that reads this, even the treavor project. If anyone has a bunch of pictures of all the teens and kids that have committed suicide due to all of the bullying and everything that they have had to go through. Please if you could send me a pic of each one. I want to make a collage to submit to the United States Legislature by the end of the year. On many levels. So I need everyone help. So that is why I am including my address in this letter. You can forward the pictures to: Brandon Garette
    4c Pinebrook Terrace
    Old Orchard Beach, Maine 04064 and if you have any questions, please feel free to contact me at 207-408-7463.

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 8:12pm
  54. He lives in the town where where I am moving to live with my girlfriend…I only wish they could have been friends. It probably wouldn’t have prevented his suicide, but maybe, just maybe, knowing more accepting people would have given him more drive to keep living. This story just makes me so sad.

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 8:17pm
  55. @Evyn, I agree with you. Suicide is a selfish act, especially in a role model position. I also understand that when you are in that much pain though, sometimes your options seem limited. We all want happy endings to terrible stories and in a perfect world, every aspect of this should have been different. So sad and frustrating on many fronts.

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 8:23pm
  56. Todd, u r so fortunate to have had support…..but vicious, cruel, abusive, violent support might have sent u over the edge like Eric’s unsupportive, unloving PARENTS, who is to say what sent him over the edge but it isnt too hard to figure out that when the ones we love dont love us back, that’s pretty f-en hard to handle and it is totally unnecessary

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 8:36pm
  57. I used to be anti gay but when I look at my son n see how much love I have for him in my heart, if he was gay, I would still love him with all my heart and love his gayness, I could not stop loving him and support anything antigay like I did

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 8:37pm
  58. or my daughter or my other son…..

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 8:40pm
  59. You moron. You sound just as inflexible as his parents. Obviously, you’ve never experienced deep pain, sadness, depression, and a trauma.

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 8:47pm
  60. As someone who is a member of the LGBT community I can’t honestly say that it gets better. It gets different, and one tends to develop a thicker skin, and in that sense it’s better, but the hate seems even more pervasive then it did in the 80′s when I was a teen.

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 8:50pm
  61. Awee he’s cute XD

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 8:54pm
  62. That’s too bad. RIP Ericjames.

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 8:54pm
  63. anybody that disrespects a homosexual should be frowned on they are humans just like everyone else just cuz they like the same sex doesnt mean they are different i lost a cousin because he was gay and the people around him made fun of him. im straight but will stand up for any homosexual

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 9:07pm
  64. This is what the affects of bigotry and intolerance lead to. May he RIP. So tragic.

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 9:24pm
  65. This simply must stop.

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 9:25pm
  66. R.I.P Eric

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 9:35pm
  67. It is wrong to say that “his parents killed him” because you don’t know the whole story! I know that his parents are very religious and are against homosexuality, but they did try to protect him the best way they knew how to from the bullying by changing schools several times when the schools failed to fix the situation. I am a lesbian woman who went through the same hardships as Eric growing up . My family and Eric’s family have known eachother for many years and i know that they love and miss him very much!

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 9:55pm
  68. Another angel

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 9:55pm
  69. His parents “were” at his funeral which was held on the 21st ! I know this because i was there as well!

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 10:00pm
  70. So young to end a life because non supporters just don’t get it….rest in peace my friend

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 10:11pm
  71. This is very sad, I believe that everyone deserves to be happy no matter what. I mean you don’t have to like LGBT but at least let them be I mean they are humans and even animals have the right to do and be free. I have a son and I can’t even imagine something like this and as a parent of course I wouldn’t want him to be gay but if he is trust me I’ll be in the front row with the rainbow flag supporting him. Life is only one why live it hating when there are so many beautiful things you could be doing instead.

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 10:32pm
  72. this hurts me so bad. and the evil monsters that were his parents get away with it all :(

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 10:54pm
  73. In Junior High I had the gym teacher from Hell! Well his name was Helstrom (I forgive but DON’T forget!) I think he wanted to be a drill sargent. He thought a little humiliation was a character builder. ( I think.) Any fault he wanted to point out about my fellow students he did in front of Everyone! He even had a paddle (and I an not talking for a canoe.) It was 2 inches thick with holes and about a foot and a half square. I only remember it being used only once. The poor student had to pull down his gyms shorts (again in front of the whole class) and whack! (Try that today!) The thing with the holes was, we were told it was to help against air resistance but even just a gentle hit (which glady he did) it left marks. Again no real pain just embarassment.

    Once I have a bad cough and decided gym was not the thing ti do but I didn’t have a note from my parents. He waited until the class finished the opening exercises than called me up in front of the class. Unfortunatly I was wear matching shirt and pants of a purple color. “You going to do a dance routine for us?” After being told “get a note next time.” I was let alone.

    Then when we were doing wrestling which was new to me. I didn’t know you were supposed to use your whole body to squirm and try to get free. Again he took me up in front of the whole class and said “If you don’t try harder I will transfer you to the girls’ class.” (Damn, if I knew then what I know now!) But I was devistated! What could I do? This was a teacher! This was in the 70′s and there was no one to tell or I felt no one who would do anything about it. And I thought about suicide. Obviously since you are reading this is never happened. But I imagined him at my funeral crying. “See what you did! You pushed me too far!” Than one day I looked up from that first row where he sat and saw the rest of the church. It was crammed with people! Some I hardly knew. They cared for me and I had hurt them! I hurt them ALL! And then I realized that this one man wasn’t worth it. After that I just treated him like any other bully and tried to stay out of his sight. I pray that other people will get the same insight. Although I don’t know them, it still feels like a part of me has died.

    I wrote in a story I posted on the internet of students standing up against a bully who was going to beat up a gay student because celebrities stood up for a gay man that was attacked. Okay, it was fiction but I wrote that 10 years ago. Some said I was ahead of my time. Why do things only change when people start to die?

    Things do get better. We need to scream it from the bell towers! We’ll all get there in the end. And we need to look after the next generation. After all they are our future.

    Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 at 10:56pm
  74. The message he was sending was so important and true. However, he disowned his beliefs and threw everything away when he killed himself. If you have the talk you gotta walk the walk! How can his message mean anything when he went against his own message. Just extremely disappointing!

    Posted on Wednesday, February 1, 2012 at 12:37am
  75. Are we not in the year 2012??? this crap is still happening. His parents have to live with it now punishment.

    Posted on Wednesday, February 1, 2012 at 4:37am
  76. Will it ever stop…? Ever???

    Posted on Wednesday, February 1, 2012 at 4:40am
  77. These stories sadden and sicken me. RIP young people and citizens of the world!!!

    Posted on Wednesday, February 1, 2012 at 8:51am
  78. The deaths of these children is a pathetic statement on society and it’s disgusting to think how many people would have known about the torture this child was forced to endure, he was 19 that’s a lot of silence, but what’s sickening is to know that those who remained silent or didn’t want to get involved would probably claim to be good Christians. That makes arguments for becoming a Christian nation terrifying since it would be but a step away from stoning those labeled different to death in the streets or locking them up as threats to society. It breaks the heart of me as broken as it already is, that we claim to be the home of the brave land of the free when it’s nothing more than BS used to deny who so many of us really are the terorist within.

    Posted on Wednesday, February 1, 2012 at 9:11am
  79. We have been under assault by the religious community for way too long. They attack innocent people and then blame them for what they did. They are all cults from what I can tell. They tell you what to believe. They create a heirachy that takes peoples power away from them. I grew up in one of those families and have thought about suicide so many times. As I child I too attempted it. It’s so sad that this is main stream stuff. Abuse against us is still accepted or ignored as if it doesn’t matter – it’s only us.
    I think we need another Stonewall!

    Posted on Wednesday, February 1, 2012 at 3:15pm
  80. Heard about this on GTF, it’s really sad that someone ends thier life because of the shortsightness and intolerance of others.

    Posted on Wednesday, February 1, 2012 at 4:04pm
  81. is anyone else disturbed that the person writing this article said someone copyrighted this suicide letter?? How sleazy is that?

    Posted on Thursday, February 2, 2012 at 11:29am
  82. If those sewer rat, religious zealot parents of Eric Borges did or had the beatings and religious zealot praying done on that kid when he was under 18 those two fucks need to be charged with child endangerment. They need to do jail time, community service, and a swift kick in their asses. Darn when are we going to get rid of those over-the-edge religious whack jobs.

    Posted on Thursday, February 2, 2012 at 6:15pm