Marking the Crisis’ beginning has been difficult for the many who lived through it and lost friends, family and loved ones to the disease. For younger generations unfamiliar with the tragedy and urgency of the epidemic’s early years, noting the anniversary has been more academic than personal or emotional.

This year, screenwriter and director David Weissman — whose credits include the 2000 film “The Family Man,” 2001’s “Evolution” and 2010’s “When in Rome” — releases his “We Were Here,” a documentary profiling the earliest days of the Crisis at its epicenter, San Francisco.

The disease ravaged the city and its gay-popular Castro St. neighborhoods. By 1979, one “We Were Here” interviewee estimates, close to 10 percent of the city’s gay population was already infected with HIV. By the time HIV tests became possible near the mid-1980s, nearly 50 percent or more of the city’s gay men had already been infected.

The Crisis’ history is emotional and complex — very often an equal mix of painful remembrance and triumphant celebration. But, of the many purposes Weissman hopes his film fulfills, he says bridging the gap between older and younger generations, and particularly between older and younger gay men, is among one of the most important. For him, it’s about sharing community and history.

Peter Berlin

David Weissman

qnotes had the opportunity to chat with Weissman via phone just weeks before his film hits pay-per-view and video-on-demand services across the country on Dec. 9. The film is also slated for a DVD release sometime around June 2012, when PBS’ “Independent Lens” showcases it.

Matt Comer: So, you moved to San Francisco in 1976, right? Why the move?

David Weissman: I had been living in Venice Beach in Southern California. It was a bit bohemian, a poor people’s beach town. It was a wonderful, wonderful time and place there. But, Venice was gentrifying really fast and I realized that San Francisco was really where my people were, the sort of long-haired, artistic and politically-minded gay people. There was a huge community there unique to San Francisco.

Were you already out at the time?

It was a process, but, yes, I was already out. I was not so engaged in gay life in L.A. as much as I became engaged with it in San Francisco.

In your film, an interviewee says that HIV was already present in San Francisco as early as 1976. Then, according to your film, before anybody really knew there was anything wrong, a young man had posted photos of weird physical symptoms he was having on the glass window of a pharmacy. But, when was it that you got the first inclination that something was wrong?

I remember the very first article in Bay Area Reporter. In April 1981, there was a cluster of rare cancer found among gay men. In June of that year, another article originating from the Centers for Disease Control saying a cluster of rare pnuemonia had been found among gay men. So, I saw the very first press on it. I also remember seeing those photographs posted on the Star Pharmacy on Castro St. So, I was aware from the very beginning.

How did you react? Were you immediately scared or concerned or at the time, perhaps, you thought, oh, this is a fluke and it’ll pass?

I think everybody had their own particular combination of fear and denial that they worked through over time. I think initially we were kind of laughing about it. It was like we had our own gay everything — our gay mechanics and gay bankers — and now we have our own disease. I think pretty quickly it became clear that this was serious and once you knew someone who got sick you got scared pretty quickly.

How long did you live in San Francisco?

I still partially live there, actually. I was there full-time through 2004 and I’ve been back and forth from Portland since then.

So, this film is not a purely academic exercise for you, then. This is something you lived through.

It’s not academic at all — it’s one reason I decided to make the film. I felt like it was crucial that the story be told by someone who lived through it, rather than from an academic perspective. I’ve described it as me using these five people [interviewed in the documentary] to tell my own story.

Tell me a bit more: Why did you think it was so important for someone who lived through it to tell the story?

Brett Ratner

The slur came in during a question and answer period following the screening last weekend of his new film, “Tower Heist.” He later appeared on the Howard Stern Show on Sirius XM and discussed masturbation, cunnilingus, pubic hair, the size of his testicles, and his sexual encounter with Lindsay Lohan.

The drumbeat of criticism continued Tuesday, culminating in Ratner's resignation, reported the Los Angeles Times.

It was not immediately clear whether Ratner's handpicked host, Eddie Murphy, would also leave the Academy Award broadcast, scheduled for late February.

The Academy's president Tom Sherak told reporters Tuesday afternoon, "He did the right thing for the academy and for himself. Words have meaning, and they have consequences. Brett is a good person, but his comments were unacceptable. We all hope this will be an opportunity to raise awareness about the harm that is caused by reckless and insensitive remarks, regardless of the intent."

In an open letter to the entertainment industry, Ratner wrote:

Dear Colleagues,

Over the last few days, I've gotten a well-deserved earful from many of the people I admire most in this industry expressing their outrage and disappointment over the hurtful and stupid things I said in a number of recent media appearances. To them, and to everyone I've hurt and offended, I’d like to apologize publicly and unreservedly.

As difficult as the last few days have been for me, they cannot compare to the experience of any young man or woman who has been the target of offensive slurs or derogatory comments. And they pale in comparison to what any gay, lesbian, or transgender individual must deal with as they confront the many inequalities that continue to plague our world.

So many artists and craftspeople in our business are members of the LGBT community, and it pains me deeply that I may have hurt them. I should have known this all along, but at least I know it now: words do matter. Having love in your heart doesn't count for much if what comes out of your mouth is ugly and bigoted. With this in mind, and to all those who understandably feel that apologies are not enough, please know that I will be taking real action over the coming weeks and months in an effort to do everything I can both professionally and personally to help stamp out the kind of thoughtless bigotry I’ve so foolishly perpetuated.

As a first step, I called Tom Sherak this morning and resigned as a producer of the 84th Academy Awards telecast. Being asked to help put on the Oscar show was the proudest moment of my career. But as painful as this may be for me, it would be worse if my association with the show were to be a distraction from the Academy and the high ideals it represents.

I am grateful to GLAAD for engaging me in a dialogue about what we can do together to increase awareness of the important and troubling issues this episode has raised and I look forward to working with them. I am incredibly lucky to have a career in this business that I love with all of my heart and to be able to work alongside so many of my heroes. I deeply regret my actions and I am determined to learn from this experience.

Sincerely,
Brett Ratner

In an interview appearing in this week’s New York magazine, on newsstands Monday, Oct. 17, and online now, Quinto acknowledges he's gay after years of avoiding questions about his personal life. And in a statement posted on his blog Sunday, Quinto cited the recent suicide of New York gay teen Jamey Rodemeyer as the catalyst for coming out.

From Quinto's blog:

when i found out that jamey rodemeyer killed himself - i felt deeply troubled. but when i found out that jamey rodemeyer had made an it gets better video only months before taking his own life - i felt indescribable despair. i also made an it gets better video last year - in the wake of the senseless and tragic gay teen suicides that were sweeping the nation at the time.

but in light of jamey's death - it became clear to me in an instant that living a gay life without publicly acknowledging it - is simply not enough to make any significant contribution to the immense work that lies ahead on the road to complete equality. our society needs to recognize the unstoppable momentum toward unequivocal civil equality for every gay lesbian bisexual and transgendered citizen of this country. gay kids need to stop killing themselves because they are made to feel worthless by cruel and relentless bullying. parents need to teach their children principles of respect and acceptance.

we are witnessing an enormous shift of collective consciousness throughout the world. we are at the precipice of great transformation within our culture and government. i believe in the power of intention to change the landscape of our society - and it is my intention to live an authentic life of compassion and integrity and action. jamey rodemeyer's life changed mine. and while his death only makes me wish that i had done this sooner - i am eternally grateful to him for being the catalyst for change within me. now i can only hope to serve as the same catalyst for even one other person in this world. that - i believe - is all that we can ask of ourselves and of each other.

In the New York magazine interview, Quinto, 34, tells editor Benjamin Wallace, that his eight-month role last year in Angels in America, "made me realize how fortunate I am to have been born when I was born..."

"And at the same time, as a gay man, it made me feel like I — there's still so much work to be done. There's still so many things that need to be looked at and addressed. The undercurrent of that fear and that, you know, insidiousness still is swarming. It's still all around us. To revisit that world at all, it took a toll on me. It definitely was an incredible experience but it was really daunting at times.

Following is Quinto's "It Gets Better" video:

“We need to do everything we can to counteract hatred and shame and we need to be strong in this fight.”

Alan Cumming

Alan Cumming is an award-winning film, television and stage actor. He has appeared in more than 100 films and television series, as well as major theatrical productions in London and on Broadway.

Cumming grew up on the east coast of Scotland, the son of a forester and a secretary. As a teenager, he began appearing in high school plays and local theater productions. In 1982, he enrolled at the Royal Scottish Academy of Music and Drama, where he received a B.A. in dramatic studies.

After graduation, Cumming worked in Scottish theater and television before moving to London. In 1985, he married fellow acting student Hilary Lyon. The couple divorced eight years later.

In London, Cumming performed with the Royal Shakespeare Company and the Royal National Theatre. He received two Olivier Awards, including Best Actor in a Musical for playing the Emcee in “Cabaret.” In 1998, he reprised this role on Broadway, receiving a Tony Award for his performance.

Cumming’s many film credits include “Golden Eye,” “Emma,” “Eyes Wide Shut,” “Nicholas Nickleby,” “X2,” and “Burlesque.” On television, he has appeared on “Frasier,” “The L Word,” “Sex and the City,” Logo’s “Rick & Steve: The Happiest Gay Couple in All the World,” and on the hit series “The Good Wife” as conniving campaign manager Eli Gold.

In 1998, Entertainment Weekly named Cumming one of the 100 Most Creative People in the World. In 2008, he received the Trevor Hero Award from The Trevor Project for being “a true role model for gay and questioning youth through his spectacular and highly successful career.”

Cumming and his longtime partner, Grant Shaffer, entered into a civil partnership at the Old Royal Naval College in Greenwich, London. Cumming and Shaffer live in New York City.

“I heard the story of Harvey Milk and it gave me hope that I could live my life openly as who I am.”

Dustin Lance Black

Dustin Lance Black is a screenwriter, director and producer. In 2009, he received an Academy Award for Best Original Screenplay for “Milk,” about openly gay San Francisco politician Harvey Milk.

Black grew up in a devout Mormon household in San Antonio, Texas. After his mother remarried, he moved to Salinas, California. As a young boy, Black knew he was gay. He believed he would be “hurt and brought down” because of it and that he was going to hell. He says his “acute awareness” of his sexual orientation made him gloomy and sometimes suicidal.

In high school he fostered a love of the dramatic arts and began working on theatrical productions. He enrolled at UCLA’s School of Theater, Film and Television and graduated with honors. In 2000, he wrote and directed two gay-themed films, “The Journey of Jared Price” and “Something Close to Heaven.” Black was the only Mormon writer for the HBO series about polygamy, “Big Love,” for which he received two Writers Guild of America Awards.

Captivated by the story of Harvey Milk, Black researched Milk’s life for three years, culminating in a screenplay. Academy Award-nominated director Gus Van Sant signed on with the project. In 2009, “Milk” received eight Academy Award nominations and won two. Black received an Oscar for his screenplay and Sean Penn won for best actor.

Black’s recent works include the screenplay for “Pedro,” profiling AIDS activist and MTV personality Pedro Zamora. He is the screenwriter for “J. Edgar,” a film about FBI director J. Edgar Hoover, directed by Clint Eastwood and starring Leonardo DiCaprio.

In 2009, Black topped The Advocate’s list of the “Forty under 40” most influential openly gay people. He is an outspoken LGBT activist, serving on the boards of The Trevor Project and the American Foundation for Equal Rights. Black frequently speaks about gay rights to college students across the country.

He resides in Los Angeles.

Courtesy: Indeed Films

Bavo Defurne, left, directs actor Jelle Florizoone on the set of North Sea Texas.

The film, based on an adaptation of a heartwarming coming of age novel entitled "This Is Everlasting," by writer André Sollie, stars Jelle Florizoone as Pim who loves a rough edged motorbike riding Gino played by Mathias Vergels.

This is Belgian director Bavo Defurne’s debut feature film. The Flemish-Belgian production was released earlier this year in Belgium and is enjoying its international premiere at the Montreal World Film Festival (which runs August 18-28) where it is screening in the First Films World Competition.

In an interview with The Montreal Gazette, Defurne talks about the film:

“This film explores many of the same themes as my short films – the discovery that you are not the same as everybody else, that you are different,” says Defurne, the widely-acclaimed (and openly gay) director often described as Belgium’s best kept secret – until now, that is. “But my short films didn’t go far enough, they didn’t explore what happened afterwards.”

“Coming of age films usually end with the discovery of one’s identiy, but in this film identity is not the issue, it is about love,” Defurne says. “The film is about what’s next. It is film about finding happiness. So many [gay films] do little to uplift gay people. I saw Brokeback Mountain and it is a touching and heartbreaking film that makes us all cry, but not in a good way. I wanted to make a film about the life they could have had, a happy film.”

"North Sea Texas" is showing through Tuesday at the Montreal World Film Festival at the Quartier Latin Cinema Complex.

You can see the trailer here:

Here's a synopsis, courtesy the film's producers:

Pim lives in a run-down house in a dead-end street somewhere at the Belgian coast, together with his mother Yvette Bulteel (better known as Yvette Mimosa, local accordion starlet). Life here smells of cold French fries, cheap cigarettes, vermouth and stale beer. Mother Yvette uses her fat Etienne with his lousy grey Fiat as a driver for the nights she has to “perform”.

As a kid Pim dreams of a better life, imagining princesses and beauty queens. But when Pim turns 16 he dreams of Gino, the boy next door, instead. Ever since they were children there has been this tension between them. Now Gino is Pim’s motorcycling hero. Cold mockery, little humiliations and tiny bits of hope make up Pim’s life. No wonder he sometimes flees to his dream world.

Then one day Yvette leaves with young, hunky Zoltan, the boy from the fair. When Yvette leaves her son alone in the empty house, Pim seizes the opportunity and his dreams become half-truths. Pim moves to the neighbours’ house to live with Marcella, his “second mum”. And with Sabrina, Gino’s sister, who circles longingly around Pim. He even sleeps in Gino’s bed! But Gino’s off romancing and living with a girl from across the border.

Dreams never come true. Or do they? On a rainy day Gino returns.

For more on the film, and future screenings, go to the "North Sea Texas" official website, or to the film's Facebook page.

From the producers: "This video is for everybody. Who has ever loved. And has been loved in return. To those that think it never does or will get better. It does. It does get better, it becomes beautiful."

Watch:

The film was directed by Sean Penberthy, and produced by Jason O'Ffill, Brandon Riess and Val Neminov.

I was intrigued by the play’s dark and mysterious reputation, and had heard that it included a lot of homosexuality (funny how that word isn’t used much anymore). It sounded like exactly what this budding young queer needed: some lessons about the yellow brick road ahead.

I didn’t like what I saw.

The characters, a group of gay men celebrating a birthday, were mean and sad and angry with one another. And they were all presented like weird, exotic animals, bitching and crying for the lascivious thrill of a very shocked audience in Shreveport, Louisiana.

I left the show feeling terribly disenchanted, fearing my life was destined to be drunken and pathetic.

It was the theatrical opposite of an "It Gets Better" video.

In the insightful and appropriately melancholy new documentary "Making the Boys," the remarkable journey of the groundbreaking play and movie adaptation is discussed by playwright Mart Crowley and a host of gay cultural voices, old and new.

When The Boys in the Band opened off-Broadway in 1968, homosexuality was still classified as a mental illness. The play’s behind-the-scenes peek at gay men in their natural habitat was fascinating to audiences and greeted with enthusiasm from the gay community.

Yes, they were maladjusted, self hating fags, but they were our maladjusted, self hating fags.

But in 1969, as the movie version was being filmed only blocks from the Stonewall bar, a riot occurred at the club in response to constant police harassment. The modern gay rights movement was born.

Seemingly overnight, New York gays stood up for themselves and demanded some respect -- from others and, more importantly, themselves. By the time the film version of "The Boys in the Band" opened in 1970, the story and its sad characters felt like a politically incorrect relic.

We wanted nothing to do with these old, bitter friends anymore. They didn’t reflect our “pride.”

Opinions about the show vary wildly, as evidenced by the interviews in the documentary. Gay playwright Edward Albee (“Who’s Afraid of Virginia Wolfe?”) always hated the show and still does. The surviving actors (the theatrical cast all recreated their roles for the film) staunchly defend the humanity of their characters. And younger gays interviewed about the show have no idea what the hell we’re talking about.

“I don’t really know about any boys in the band,” states perplexed fashion star Christian Siriano. “Honey, I’ve got dresses to make!”

"The Boys in the Band" has become a litmus test for how you view our ability to love ourselves. And those boys continue to reverberate and reflect our attitudes and tribulations as gay men, and that includes the AIDS crisis.

Watching the film today, I’m struck with an odd compulsion. I see these characters laughing and bitching, and I want to reach through the screen and shake them and warn them, to tell them about something coming, something too awful to describe, of a plague they can’t possibly comprehend that is coming to kill them all.

Indeed, at one point in Making the Boys, we are shown photos of the actors, of the men who played these iconic characters we loved and then hated and then, finally, simply accepted. And listed under each of the actors’ names is the year he died of AIDS. 1984. 1985. 1988. On and on it goes, through what appears to be a majority of the cast.

The moment brings about such emotional confusion, of regret and interrupted affections. It’s like hearing of a death of a long lost friend with whom you had a troubled relationship.

Our boys continue to live on through the film, performing their roles on that screen exactly the same way, defiant in their stereotypes, no matter how many times we revisit the movie.

What has changed, for better and for worse, is us.

You know who would probably have had some choice words to say about this blog posting if he were still alive? Vito Russo, author of the milestone book on gays in film, The Celluloid Closet.

On the occasion of the 30th anniversary of the book’s publication, writer Mark Adnum provides a provocative re-examination of the book and the attitude of its author.

And to hear Adnum tell it, Russo was a hard-to-please bitch who happened to address the topic of gays in the movies at the right time (although others were there first, according to Adnum).

This, from Adnum’s piece: The Celluloid Closet is saturated with frustrated references to “tortured little gay boys,” “homosexual fools,” and “sad-eyed queens.” Russo couldn’t stand “screaming queens” or “doe-eyed, timid faggots,” yet oddly “self-hating gays” really rubbed him the wrong way also. Ouch. So, was Russo a gay activism icon, or just another bitter boy in the band?

HVTN 505, also known as the HIV vaccine clinical trial, continues to struggle to find study participants, and that’s a shame.

You know I never miss an opportunity to encourage HIV negative gay men and engage them in the HIV/AIDS arena, and this is the best possible way in which they can make a difference to public health. But… maybe they just aren’t sure what is involved.

Well, Kyle Bella outlines his experience as a trial participant in great detail in a recent Bilerico Project posting — from the criteria to the risks to his physical exam — and it’s great information for anyone who might be interested. And be sure to visit Hope Takes Action to browse the list of trial sites.

The ADAP Advocacy Association (aaa+) has a new petition that is easy to access and sign — and it adds your voice to all of us who are horrified about this national disgrace.

Most recently, Sir Elton John joined the chorus of advocates demanding that Gov. Rick Scott of Florida do something to alleviate the waiting list (there are more than 3500 patients in Florida alone who are waiting to participate in this program).

So… just click here to sign a petition at the Elton John AIDS Foundation, asking that ADAP get the funding it desperately needs.

In "Becoming Chaz," Bono, the 42-year-old son of Cher and the late Sonny Bono -- who was born Chastity Bono in 1969 -- shares his intimate and personal journey of gender reassignment. Here's a preview:

The Los Angeles Times calls "Becoming Chaz" "undoubtedly one of the most thought-provoking films you will see on any screen this year. A frankly chronicled tale of Chaz's life as a transgender man that opens a more than occasionally mind-blowing conversation about the essentials of gender, and subsequently, sexuality."

The film premiered at the Sundance Film Festival in January, which Bono attended with his partner, Jennifer Elia. The television debut is Tuesday night on OWN (The Oprah Winfrey Network).

From the first day of school through the last, Award-winning documentary filmmaker Lee Hirsch intimately follows the lives of a few of the many courageous kids and families bullying has affected this past year. The film captures the distress of bullying victims, the frustration of their parents, and in some cases, the overwhelming grief when bullying ends a life.

Watch the trailer here:

This alarming documentary explores the devastation of two families coping with their sons' suicide, while one mother faces her 14-year-old daughter's incarceration after she threatens her bullies with a gun.

Hirsh is given rare access to the Sioux City Community School District, where he captures "up close and disturbing on the ground footage of bullying in classrooms, playgrounds, cafeterias, and school buses," according to the film's synopsis.

"The Bully Project" premieres at the Tribeca Film Festival in New York on April 23.

Ryan Kelley and Sigourney Weaver in
Prayers for Bobby

In our struggle for equality, we are so often met with the question “Can people really change?”

We so frequently run up against the wall of having a conversation with someone who seems unmovable. And sometimes, the sad truth of the matter is that some people are indeed unmovable.

In the case of Mary Griffith, it wasn’t until her young gay son took his own life that she saw the repercussions of her ignorance.

Mary’s story, “Prayers for Bobby” by Leroy Arons, tells the story of life with her son, Bobby. And most importantly, it tells the story of how someone can change when presented with irrational fears of what they don’t understand.

The book was made into a film last year by the Lifetime Network and it garnered several recognitions including Emmy nominations for Outstanding Made for Television Movie and Outstanding Leading Actress in a Miniseries or Movie, for Sigourney Weaver.

The film won the GLAAD Media Award for Outstanding Miniseries or TV Movie and Weaver took home a Trevor Life Award from the Trevor Project for her portrayal of Mary Griffith.

On the occasion of the DVD release, Weaver took a few moments to chat with Talk About Equality about the film, on playing Mary Griffith and how things can get better.

T.A.E.: Talk About Equality is devoted to telling our stories and we believe that these stories are what will help us win our equality. In your travels, have you had the opportunity to see or hear about the impact your telling of Mary’s story has had on someone?

Sigourney Weaver: A young person had confided in her mother a few days before that she was gay and her mother had freaked out and taken her phone away and grouneded her. Then they Saw the movie together and the mother started the process of being able to talk about it with her child and it went from impossible to…let’s start this dialogue. And it was such an immediate heartening result from watching the movie together. It [the movie] takes you through people coming out with such disastrous results.

Mary Griffith

I thought my friends surely didn’t have that big a problem but the four people I talked to had such terrible stories to share with me.

One of them, who goes out in drag quite a bit -- his grandmother actually helps him get ready, but they’ve never discussed it ... it defies logic ... so there’s a real need for more stories like this to be told.

T.A.E.: The transition Mary had after the loss of Bobby is one that so many kids fantasize will happen with their own intolerant parents. Speaking as a parent, what would you tell these intolerant parents and how did you personally handle Mary’s transition from intolerance to pride?

S. W.: The main thing to remember is that you love your child and we as parents must love and respect our children and listen to them.

I think the one thing I feel was so tragic about what Mary did was not her belief or her ignorance, but that she refused to listen to Bobby. She just refused to, and that actually is what cost him his life. If she’d been able to listen, if she had been able to keep that door open, then things might have worked out differently.

Sigourney Weaver and Ryan Kelley in
Prayers for Bobby

As a parent we all have a tendency to want our children to lead very safe regular lives. Lives that are protected somehow -- It's really a fallacy. Its not what any of us did and we have to be brave enough as parents to trust our children and encourage them to be who
they are and all that they are.

It takes such incredible courage to be gay in
this society, in this world right now and your child really needs your support -- really needs you to be there for him or her. It’s the most important way you can express your love to your child – by listening and supporting.

T.A.E.: You’re an actor who never shies away from a challenge when it comes to the roles you choose -- from the big commercial hits like "Avatar" or "Aliens" to smaller releases like "Prayers for Bobby" or "Snow Cake" -- and each of these characters I’m sure brought something new to your life.

Did you have a “seeing the world with new eyes” moment with this character and movie?

S. W.: I definitely did. When I read the script I was a little of horrified by Mary -- I thought there was this huge chasm between myself and her. My immediate thought was she must live in this kind of place that’s far away from a metropolis, where there might be a big gay community. And then of course when I visited her -- she’s about 30 minutes away from downtown San Francisco.

I realized that we can be closed-minded wherever we are -- even in a big city. I think I had used that geographical idea to sort of marginalize Mary and once I realized that she was in a city and I met her -- mother to mother -- I realized how much she loved Bobby, how much she loved all her children.

Bobby Griffith

Her house is filled with things he made -- his dolls, his drawings, his little attic room is just as he left it. We just met as mothers. She is so courageous and so honest and so candid about who she was then and what the repercussions had been of her prejudice and ignorance.

We are parents who want to protect our children from things we don’t understand, things that frighten us.

I stopped being the East Coast judger. This can happen to any of us. It creeps up on us because we love our children and we think by loving them, we should keep them from being who they are. If I just say no, they can change their minds.

And that’s what the story is, of the terrible mistakes she made, and that he was perfect as he was. She just couldn’t see it. She didn’t have any help or support until she reached out to PFLAG (Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays). PFLAG saved her and made it possible for her to share her story with all the rest of us.

T.A.E.: I’m sure you’ve heard about Dan Savage’s It Gets Better Project, designed to reach out to LGBT kids who may be contemplating suicide. In that vein, if you could, if things were different, is there anything you would want to say to Bobby Griffith?

S. W.: Wow … I would say … 'Dear Bobby, give your mother [a chance...]' ... these are all things he did do because he loved his family so much. He tried so hard to give them the time to embrace him as who he was.

So it’s very hard for me to know what to say to Bobby except, 'We’re going to do everything we can to make sure kids don’t feel that way.'

It’s so hard to say ‘go live your life’ and eventually your family will come around and you will find out that you can be this magnificent gay man with so much to offer, with a community and with a family you can have -- a family of your own and eventually your family will hopefully meet you halfway.

And if not, you’ll have your own family and your own community and it will get better. What could be more painful than what you’re going through now? So just hang in there. And know there are people who love you and care about you and value you and you should be around, because you’re a terrific young person.

For Bobby, everything hinged on the approval of his family. I think there wasn’t The Trevor Project or all these other places where he could have, maybe had, more people reaching out to him.

Where he could finally get the message? It was a message he felt he didn’t have the right to accept. He couldn’t allow himself to love someone and be loved if his family didn’t love him first. That’s the lesson from this story really -- it’s really hard for someone to love themselves without ever learning how to from their family.

Many thanks to Sigourney for taking the time out to speak with us about this incredible film.

If you have not seen it, you can order the DVD here. And if you have seen it, go buy a few copies of the DVD to give to friends and family who might be able to use it.

Here's a preview:

Sure, gay actors like Jane Lynch and Chris Colfer from Glee have won Golden Globes for their TV acting, but Oscar remains astoundingly homophobic.

Ironically, the Academy has a storied history of showering accolades on straight actors for playing gay roles.  Tom Hanks won Best Actor in 1993 for Philadelphia, Hilary Swank won Best Actress in 1999 for Boys Don't Cry, Nicole Kidman won Best Actress in 2002 for her portryal of Virginia Woolf in The Hours, Charlize Theron won Best Actress in 2003 for Monster, Philip Seymour Hoffman won in 2005 for Capote, and Sean Penn won Best Actor in 2009 for Milk.

Straight actors nominated for playing gay roles include Jude Law for The Talented Mr. Ripley in 1999, Javier Bardem in 2002 for Before Night Falls and Salma Hayek that same year for Frida, Heath Ledger and Jake Gyllenhaal in 2005 for Brokeback Mountain, Felicity Huffman the same year for Transamerica, and Judi Dench in 2006 for Notes On A Scandal.  The tradition continues this year, with Annette Bening's nomination for Best Actress in The Kids Are Alright, and Natalie Portman for Best Actress, if you count the lesbian scene in Black Swan.

Why the double standard?  Aren't gay actors just as capable of playing gay characters as straight actors?

Perhaps the Academy believes a gay actor in a gay role isn't enough of a "stretch", or isn't even acting.  But ask any gay actor and they will tell you that playing straight or gay onscreen is basically the same thing.

For love scenes, actors are not actually having sex, and they may not even like their co-star.  They are surrounded for hours or days by film crews, and the actors' job is making it look good on camera, not making themselves feel good.  The angles and lighting have to be just right, the actors' bodies and faces have to be positioned just so, the director usually demands several takes to get the shots he wants. 

James Franco, who is co-hosting this year's ceremonies and has played several gay roles, said in a recent interview that he had respect for porn actors, because they were really "selling it", and not having sex on camera just for their own pleasure.

So if there really is no difference between a straight actor playing a gay role and a gay actor playing a gay role, there shouldn't be any valid reason for gay actors in gay roles to not get nominated, right?  Wrong. 

If you asked the Academy why that is, the answer you would get is, "Blame Hollywood."  And it is correct.  Casting agents who work with gay actors frequently tell their clients to keep their sexuality a secret from the public, or risk being blacklisted. 

Of course, everyone in show business knows who's gay and who isn't, but for actors to publicly announce they are gay is still taboo.  The most successful producers and directors look at the bottom line, which is making blockbusters and/or awards season contenders.  To do that, they feel they must be risk-averse and stick to a formula.  That formula, unfortunately, doesn't include casting a gay person in a gay role, or any role. 

As a result, gay actors tend to be offered sub-par roles in gay movies by studios that don't have the resources to produce quality work and market their films aggressively enough to be serious Oscar contenders.

Will this ever change?  Only if and when the powers that be in Hollywood are bold enough to take the risk that mainstream American audiences will pay to see gay actors in gay roles.  Of course, the movie has to be great enough for people to want to see it.  For the most part, queer cinema in the United States, for lack of a better word, sucks. 

In other countries, particularly Italy, France, and Israel, queer cinema is outstanding and booming.  Gay-themed movies featuring gay actors get government financing.  The plots are well-written, the acting is superb, and the films win awards.  Perhaps the state of queer cinema in the U.S. is one reason Hollywood big shots are so risk-averse when it comes to casting gay actors.

Let's hope that the tide changes, attitudes shift, and one day we'll see gay actors standing at the podium on Oscar night, trophy in hand.  Until then, enjoy watching straight actors steal our thunder.

VANITY FAIR

In a new interview, Oscar nominated actor Johnny Depp reveals that Disney hated his "gay" portrayal of Captain Jack Sparrow, and that he once quipped to film executives that all his characters "are gay."

In this month's edition of Vanity Fair magazine, rock legend Patti Smith interviews Depp about his controversial portrayal Captain Jack Sparrow in the Walt Disney Studios runaway hit film series "Pirates of the Caribbean," about working with Angelina Jolie, and his own musical aspirations.

In an excerpt from the interview, Depp talks about Disney executive's dismay over his portrayal of the roguish pirate sea captain, and what it’s like to play the iconic role of Captain Jack Sparrow:

“Somebody once asked [Hunter S. Thompson], “What is the sound of one hand clapping, Hunter?,” and he smacked him. Captain Jack was kind of like that for me, an opening up of this part of yourself,” Depp says. “There is a little Bugs Bunny in all of us.”

“They couldn’t stand him. They just couldn’t stand him,” Depp says of Disney’s reaction to his controversial interpretation of Sparrow.

“I think it was Michael Eisner, the head of Disney at the time, who was quoted as saying, ‘He’s ruining the movie.’ Depp reveals to Smith, however, that he remained unfazed by the studio’s hysteria.

“Upper-echelon Disney-ites, going, What’s wrong with him? Is he, you know, like some kind of weird simpleton? Is he drunk? By the way, is he gay?… And so I actually told this woman who was the Disney-ite… ‘But didn’t you know that all my characters are gay?’ Which really made her nervous.”

Depp's latest film co-starring Jolie, "The Tourist," is due in theaters on Dec. 10. The next Disney Pirate's production, "Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides," starring Depp as Sparrow, is currently slated for release in 2011.

Vince Vaughn in The Dilemma

In remarks made public on Thursday, Vaughn said that he joins in the outrage over "bullying and persecution of people for their differences," but insisted, "comedy and joking about our differences breaks tension and brings us together."

The controversy stems from a theatrical trailer for the upcoming Ron Howard comedy, which stars Vaughn and Kevin James ("King of Queens").

In the trailer, Vaughn is seen delivering a presentation about electric cars in a board room setting, where he delivers the line, “Electric cars are gay. I mean, not homosexual gay, but my-parents-are-chaperoning-the-dance gay.”

After both GLAAD and CNN anchor Anderson Cooper complained that such words are insensitive and harmful, Universal Pictures said it would remove the phrase "Electric cars are gay" from the trailer.

But Vaughn now says he wishes the language had been left in, although GLAAD said this week that the original trailer is still running in theaters.

"Vince is right. Comedy does bring us together, unless one of us is the punchline. Then it pushes us apart," GLAAD said it a statement on Friday.

"This isn’t about intent," GLAAD said. "It’s about the fact that no matter what the intent, when ‘gay’ is used as a pejorative, it sends a message, particularly to youth, that gay taunts are acceptable. And it sends a message to LGBT youth that they are people who should be made fun of."

Amid growing media attention to the issue of anti-gay bullying and the role it played in several recent teen suicides, GLAAD said "the use of the word ‘gay’ in this trailer as a slur is unnecessary and does nothing more than send a message of intolerance about our community to viewers.”

GLAAD is calling on Universal Pictures to remove the slur from both the film and the trailer.

“The Dilemma” is due in theaters in January.

Focused on the 2008 passage of California’s Proposition 8, Director Reed Cowan’s documentary has struck a nerve with accusations that a “Mormon front group purchased passage” of the constitutional amendment, which narrowly overturned the state Supreme Court ruling that allowed gay couples to marry.

The film, first premiered at the Sundance Film Festival in January, follows the stories of many LGBT citizens seeking marriage equality and never-before revealed Mormon efforts to stop them.

Cowan presents evidence of the LDS Church’s work to persuade its members to donate money to the campaign for Prop 8 -- and to hide the church’s involvement, knowledge of which would have dissuaded voters, through front organizations.

The stories of Tyler Barrick and Spencer Jones, two gay Mormon men, are the marquis players in 8:TMP. Barrick is the direct descendant of Mormon polygamist Fredrick G. Williams.

Watch the trailer here:

Initially, Cowan planned to focus his documentary on gay teen homelessness and suicide in Utah, but soon realized that the homophobia that prompts otherwise loving parents to kick teenagers out of their homes is deep-seated in current Mormon ideology.

Cowan, with his fellow filmmakers, experienced first-hand what it was like to grow up gay in Utah in the Mormon faith, turned their attention to the historic campaign by the Mormon Church to pass Proposition 8 in California believing that it was the cornerstone of an ideology that has worked for decades “to damage gay people and their causes.”

"8: The Mormon Proposition" opened in major markets Friday, including New York, Los Angeles, Chicago, Dallas, Phoenix, Fort Lauderdale and Washington D.C. It opens in San Francisco this week. (For all cities and theaters, visit the film's website here.)

The film will be available on DVD July 13.

Editor's note: On June 10, 2010, the Mormon Church agreed to pay a $5000 fine for failing to report some campaign staff contributions it made in support of Proposition 8.

On June 16, 2010, closing arguments were presented in a federal court in San Francisco in a landmark trial challenging the constitutionality of Proposition 8. A ruling by Chief Judge Vaughn Walker is expected within weeks. Complete trial coverage here.