Gay couple asked ‘which of you will be the mother?’… And is ultimately denied adoption

Pradeep De Silva and Matthew Broadway-Horner

Pradeep De Silva and Matthew Broadway-Horner

Pradeep De Silva and Matthew Broadway-Horner

Pradeep De Silva and Matthew Broadway-Horner

A gay couple in London is alleging antigay discrimination within the adoption process after being given some truly bizarre reasons why they’re unfit parents.

Matthew Broadway-Horner, 42, and Pradeep De Silva, 39, say they were approved to adopt in September 2014, but since then, they’ve been denied kids.

First, it was because they didn’t have toys in their house, despite the whole “not having kids yet” part.

“Which childless couple has toys in the house?” Matthew asked Metro UK. “You would think it was slightly weird.”

Another question social services asked the couple is: which man would take on the role of mother in the child’s life.

“We were asked what women we have in our family as if our living condition was somehow psychologically damaging,” Matthew added.

Matthew and Pradeep fully committed to the process, going from social worker to social worker, always trying to do and say the right thing to start the family they wanted.

They were open to adopting an older child, or even siblings, but nothing they did seemed to make any difference.

Feeling utterly discouraged, they withdrew their names from the system.

Adoptive services has a decidedly different take. They issued this statement:

Currently across the UK, there are far more families waiting to be matched with children than there are children who need to be adopted. Social workers, therefore, have a difficult task in deciding where to place children into adoptive care.

We acknowledge that the period between being approved for adoption and being allocated a child/children can be an extremely frustrating and difficult time for prospective adopters. Support is always available to adopters during this period. This very issue is being discussed at the next pan-London adoption exchange event next week.

In this specific case, we can confirm that the couple were approved for adoption by us in September 2014.

As yet a match has not been made despite attempts from both the family and a number of local authorities including us. As a result, they have now decided to withdraw from the process. It is unfortunate that they have decided on this course of action and we will retain an open door should they change their mind.

This Story Filed Under

Comments