ROB WATSON
A few months ago, I had pondered on what the now retired Pope Benedict might observe and learn on a trip with my family to Disneyland.
He had just made some rude and inaccurate observations about families like mine, and I felt the reality, as demonstrated by tens of thousands of clamoring families in the “happiest place on earth” might give him something to think about.
Pope Francis
Instead, he resigned.
Meanwhile, those within his church continued to act out obnoxiously and still others continued to put down LGBTQ families, especially those lead by gay dads. There was some hope and speculation that the next pope might actually be gay, but that is unlikely. This week he is being selected.
As a gay dad, and a professional, I thought it would be fitting to do what one should, as a matter of courtesy, when someone gets a new job. You send a note of congratulations. So, on behalf of my family, including my two 10-year old sons, I am doing just that.
Our note includes a suggested five point plan based on the principles that I have used with my sons, and that they have found effective.
Dear Pope Francis,
Welcome aboard! In full disclosure, we are not members of your church, but rather neighbors of yours in the world community. Since we apparently live in close enough proximity that your team feels the need to provide on-going commentary about us, we thought we would send you a note and warm wishes of congratulations.
We also thought we would also include a five point plan on how you might want to run the church and have an impact on the world. We don’t mean to over-step our bounds here, just make a few key suggestions. These are gay dad family style ideas…the kind that I share with my sons:
- Be a good neighbor. What we are trying to say in the kindest of ways is… mind your own business. Except for this one letter, we usually do not make it our business to tell you how to run the church, and we would like you to stop telling us what is required to be a good and legitimate family.
You have not created a family, rescued a child for life, have not spent sleepless nights over children with the flu, have not gotten your child to bed after waking with night terrors, or nursed a prematurely born child to health. So please – no lectures, and for heaven sake, please stop weighing in about our legal protections and telling everyone that if we get some, that heterosexuals will stop procreating and the world will end. Those kind of statements just make your team sound silly.
Respect women. Like your household, ours is made up 100 percent of the male persuasion. Unlike yours, our house understands that women are an intelligent and equal force in the world.
My sons have been taught to respect, revere and take heed of the women authorities in their lives. You need to as well. It is time. Some of the nuns in your employ ROCK. The misogynistic infrastructure has got to go. Your right hand man needs to be a woman.
When you are wrong, say you are sorry and accept your consequences. This is a no-brainer for my sons, but seems to be a hugely difficult concept for your church. If you collectively were my sons, you would have found yourself on SUCH a Timeout, I can’t tell you.
In any case, this is what you need to do. Cleanse the slate now. Say you are sorry to all those that have been hurt by your leadership both by direct abuse and by cover-up. Pay. Create foundations for abuse therapy and funds for direct financial restitution—not that there is a price tag to make up for what has been done. It may in fact, break your bank. You may have to sell and mortgage the riches of the church, but in the end, you will be spiritually richer.
Get relevant.
OK, that is not really a mandate I give my sons, but one that my son Jesse gives me. “Be cool, Dad.” Being cool is his top priority over being handsome, smart, or god forbid… cute. Being cool is the highest compliment. So… make the church… cool.Have you taken a look around? The Catholic Church used to be the culture icon in the Renaissance when you hired Michelangelo. You have stayed stuck in that fashion ever since. I hate to be cliché, but you need a new gay guy to come in and renovate. You need to lease the Vatican to Disney for a cool Renaissance retro-theme park, and bring in David Geffin, Elton John, Madonna and Lady Gaga to find new ways to get your message out… with a beat. Put the saints on trading cards, an make their adventures legends at the box office. Get relevant.
Do good. That is the ultimate message I give my sons, and it is the one you should be giving the world. Do good works. The world has plenty of pain, and could use a Prince of Peace. How about giving that a try for the next few decades and see where it gets you.
If I am wrong, you can go back to picking apart people’s personal gender characteristics and predicting the end of life as we know it.
So, there you go. Welcome to your new job. On behalf of me, my same sex partner, and my sons, I wish you well.
I wish for you to emulate the Lamb and herald a new dawn of hope. I hope that you learn from many of the members of your own church who are fair, tolerant and want a better world. I pray that you look out at the rainbow of the LGBTQ community and see it with the same sense of promise as Noah did when he saw his rainbow as he descended from the Ark.
Surprise us. Inspire us. Show us what love really looks like.
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futher more isnt he too olf too
Benedict being too old was just a cover story for something, not quite sure what but I’ve heard some things. Regardless, meet the new boss same as the old boss. Just as much a homophobe as the rest
He strongly opposed legislation introduced in 2010 by the Argentine Government to allow same-sex marriage, calling it a “real and dire anthropological throwback”.[18] In a letter to the monasteries of Buenos Aires, he wrote: “Let’s not be naïve, we’re not talking about a simple political battle; it is a destructive pretension against the plan of God. We are not talking about a mere bill, but rather a machination of the Father of Lies that seeks to confuse and deceive the children of God.”[19] He has also insisted that adoption by homosexuals is a form of discrimination against children. This position received a rebuke from Argentine president Cristina Fernández de Kirchner, who said the church’s tone was reminiscent of “medieval times and the Inquisition”.[20]
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pope_Francis
I had to wonder if Benedict had serious health problems or was getting senile.
Popes don’t retire.
Fantastic. Reposted. Thanks!
Awesome!
What an amazing letter, love this and definitely sharing! Thanks for the good read!
Love it.
Such a sweet letter. #1 really made sense in my opinion as a mom. They really don’t know to be preaching what a family is or should be or consist of.
Thanks for the kind comments! FYI… I actually tweeted this to the new Pope. :) . We’ll see if that did any good….
- Scratch #4 as hyper-pop commercialism that sours the rest of the suggestions – religion’s not supposed to be subject to external/worldly fashion (which it has a hard enough time separating from peaceful coexistence in the same century-let-alone-decade), and anyhow, trying to ‘make religion cool’ doesn’t work very well when it’s tried deliberately (Pope manga, anyone?)….apart from that, well worth taking seriously. At least this one takes basic social justice seriously and is not in kneejerk anti-European stance, so there’s some hope that his views may evolve as he engages further with the rest of the world.
Good going Rob. Couldn’t have said it better!
Thank you for the letter from a bisexual female in a lesbian relationship it is great that others feel the church is behind the times. Being a christian is also not easy when you are LGBTs thank you again
BIG homophobe, more so than the retiring Nazi pedophile
I only hope and dare I say pray that the Pope and his top people would actually read this wonderful letter with an an open heart and mind. It is time for a change. And while change is never easy, it is necessary.
Well stated! ? Now is will he listen and hear what you said.
give him a minute. damn.
he wont listen nor will any of the pedofile pathetic bigoted trash in that glorified museum
Amen – although I have a hard time seeking them crawl out of the 175th century…
Perfect! Couldn’t have said it better myself!! :)
I was trying to compose a letter in my head but you have done a wonderful thing-much better than I could have. I am a mother of two gay kids-Can’t go to a church who says thay are an obamination or whatever!
Well written. Well intentions. Complete fantasy.
There is nothing new here: just another tired, old man, banned from marriage to or any intimate relationship with another human being that has the nerve to think he can dictate the intimate relationships of those that actually do have an intimate relationship with another humane being. Full of hate for the LGBTQ+ community – we owe him nothing in return.
a terrible letter. the pope doesn’t care and we shouldn’t care about the catholic church either.
I have to say this is very well written….it is not written to belittle, hate or show disrespect but to ring true words in my humble opinion as what a human being feels inside their heart. Thank you for the post…it has been shared! <3
Great letter. Good for everyone of us also. Thank you
This letter will fall upon deaf ears. The new Pope is more homophobic than the last. There’s a link in article’s comment section that explains this more. Sorry to sound so pessimistic, but I’m only being honest.
Besides, I’m fairly certain the new Pope & the Catholic Church doesn’t cares for nor wants a Gay Dad’s unsolicited advice.
Oops. Should be:
…doesn’t care for nor wants….
The politicized Roman Catholic Church does not even remotely resemble “The Way,” the original 1st Century Church which you find in the book of Acts and the New Testament Epistles. It ignores the fact that in the REAL Early Church, women were pastors, teachers, evangelists and deacons.
Interesting blog article.
i really like it
CATHOLICS, if you don’t like the pope, the ideology, etc LEAVE THE CHURCH! there’s always the UNITARIAN CHURCH which accepts everyone!
I have to tell ya, Francis. You look fabulous in that dress.
He looks like such a douche! I bet he can’t wait to get ahold of some of those altar toys, err… boys…. to play with!!
drag Queen Pope!
please someone anyone is there an altar boy with a short fuse that will stand behind this bitch during one of her evita moments at the window
Unfortunately, I doubt 70 year old Nazis can think like this.
I’m willing to give hime the benefit of the doubt. People can evolve. Maybe even The Pope can learn acceptance. I hear that he is a humble man. The church needs to be welcoming to all if it is to stay alive.
don’t waste your time writing to this priest or any other. They all diddle little choirboys and that is just their past time. I don’t care how holy and ‘nice’ this pope seems – he aint’ with it – he’s 76 and hates gay people. Screw him.
This letter was fantastic. I shared it before. It was done with class and eloquence – definitely written from the <3
i don’t give much of my time or energy to this..pope
@christopher..my gf and I went to the unitarian church near us..and they were ice cold at us..and another person that I know of..because they told us they had the same experience..we never went back to that refridgerator